It's been such a lovely long weekend - spent doing a whole lot of nothing much - and hanging out with the little guy whilst his Daddy is working away in Wellington.
Whilst doing the somewhat mundane - cleaning the outside windows, on this clear Sunday afternoon, I had a bit of an epiphany - success can only be defined by one's self.
Ha - what?
You see, today whilst I was cleaning the windows, the sun was shining down on them, and I realised my first failure... I should have waited for a cloudy day - the sun just creates streaks down the windows. Damnit.
I cleaned them down again and started afresh, as the clouds rolled in. Only to realise that the frames were still dirty... I should've scrubbed those down too. Damnit.
I cleaned them down again and started afresh, determined this time to do them perfectly to finally reach that level of perfection I am always searching for - and finally reach success - and I did, I scrubbed, I hosed, I completed the task and the windows were looking pretty damn good from the outside.
Success. Finally success. We work hard for it and it feels so damn good when we finally ascertain it. It feels *Fist pump* good
Inside I went, took off my soggy wet shoes put on some cozy warm socks, I finally looked out the windows to admire my handy work and a job well done. Only to realise, the insides were dirty - with finger prints and kiss marks (who kisses windows?). Damnit.
Which is how I came to be here, evaluating success, questioning all that we do in the name of success, sure I failed at having a perfect view, but given the initial goal was to clean the OUTSIDE of the windows, surely that should amount to some level of success - why then do I feel like I've let myself down, by not cleaning the inside of the windows too?
Windows. Magazines. Blogs. Sales targets. Life. Everything is able to be measured by success, but why do I keep moving my own goal posts - why do I make it hard for myself to consider all that I've done to date a success? Instead looking ways to evolve and grow and move forward.
We all need to take stock of the things we have achieved, the things we have done really well and give ourselves a good damn pat on the back!!